Mothering Boys

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Sharon Atkins

Raising a boy can be a challenging experience but also an inspiring one for mothers.  Boys love approval and praise and they also give and need lots of love and cuddles. There are a lot of fun times, even if is sometimes noisy, messy and chaotic. Generally boys have a lovely, simple attitude to life and pleasure. We want our boys to become happy, confident and well- balanced men, so we need all the help that we can get.

Tips for raising boys

Get involved at your son’s school. Talk to the teachers regularly to find out their strengths and weaknesses in class. Monitor homework and encourage them to read every day.

Show an interest. Have dinner together and find out what is going on in their lives. Limit the time spent in front of the TV and computer games.

Boys like physical activity. Their bodies are stronger than girls and their bodies are more inclined to action. As they grow older, their bodies become more muscular and physically stronger. They might not know their own strength so spend some time with them teaching them not to hit or hurt deliberately and unintentionally.

Have a look out for boy’s groups like scouts and adventure clubs and get them involved. Team sports are also helpful in building character, leadership skills and team spirit. Boys can be very competitive so help them find activities that allow for this in safe ways.

Boys don’t form close relationships as quickly as girls do so arrange play dates and encourage them to be well mannered and share their games and toys.

Boys need a role model and someone to look up to and if a Dad is not around then they need an interested, caring man in their lives. They do need male company and someone who can play a role in their learning and development

Find ways that they can release physical energy. Encourage them to take up sports to put that energy into good use.

Communicate with them often. Teach them social skills and encourage them to ask questions and show an interest in others.

Spend lots of time together. Go on family outings and holidays and plan activities for the whole family. If you have more than one child make sure you spend individual attention on each child.

Set rules and limits and be firm about maintaining them. You can adapt these as they gets older but boundaries do make a child feel safe and secure.

How to help build boys self esteem

Give them love- unconditionally. However they behave, you still love them. You might not like the behaviour sometimes, but you do love the boy.

Give them some responsibility. Set tasks and chores for them in the home and get them to help with the cooking and cleaning. A sense of responsibility will serve them well at school

Respect their feelings. Let them cry and comfort them when they are hurt. Listen to their grievances.  When your son gets upset, let him express himself and share his emotions. It helps to label the emotion, whether it’s hurt or sad or angry.

Enjoy the adventures and exploring and new discoveries. Show an interest in the worms and spiders that they uncover, roll in the leaves and jump in the dirt and dig tunnels in the sand. Time passes so quickly and every moment is precious.


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