It seems as you get older you become more fearful. Fearful of death, disease, aging, crime, not having enough money, not doing enough and not being enough! Or maybe it’s just me? Maybe it’s the times that we are living in where we are so exposed to what is happening out there at all times and we allow this to take over our reality.
So, what actually is fear? Do we have to live with it? Can we overcome it?
One of the most helpful definitions for fear I have come across is from Dr John Demartini;
“Fear is an assumption that you are about to experience in the future through your senses or imagination more pain than pleasure, more challenge than support, more loss than gain, or more negative than positive from someone or yourself – all of which are illusions since the universe always provides a loving balance.”
If fear arises for me I think of my acronym for F.E.A.R.- False Expectations Appearing Real.
Is what I am fearing going to happen? Probably not. If I am fearful of being in car accident, or about getting a disease in the future or if my kids are safe, I stop that thought in its tracks and ask the question, is my fear actually real or a fantasy that I have created in my head? Is this event likely to happen? Most of the time the answer is no, it is highly unlikely that this will happen. The fear then dissolves for me and my anxiety switches off.
Some of the other versions which also help you put F.E.A.R. into perspective;
Future Emotions Appearing Real
For Everything A Reason
Finding Excuses And Reasons
Failure Expected And Received
Future Events Appearing Real
False Expectations About Reality
Forget Everything And Run
Fear is a feedback. I’m grateful for my fears. My fears let me know when I’m going after delusions. It makes sure I set strategies that are real. The second I do, the fear dissolves.
If we want to live a miraculous life, we must raise the volume on the loving voice within us and turn down the volume on our fear.
The first step in choosing love over fear is to understand your fear.
“I learned to become the witness to my fear-based thoughts. Each time I felt fear set in, I’d take a deep breath, step outside of my thoughts and actions, and witness my behaviour. By witnessing my fears, I was able to see how delusional they actually were.” Bernstein
“Fear is trusting in your own powers.” Marianne Williamson
Try this Daily Affirmation from Gabrielle Bernstein
“Today I am the witness to my fear. I open my heart and mind to see how I have chosen fear over love. Today I will watch myself as if I’m standing across the street peeking into the world I have created. I will witness how my fears run the show. I will pay attention to my patterns. Without judgment I will become conscious of where my mind chose wrongly and how these fear-based thoughts have tainted my happiness. I know this practice is the first step to uncovering my destructive patterns to create powerful change. I am ready, willing and able to look at the delusional thoughts I’ve been projecting. I’m willing to witness my fear.”
Sit in stillness for a minute. Let this passage soak in.
Whenever you notice your fears rise up during the day, repeat the affirmation above. For instance, if you become anxious at work, nervous before a date, or uncomfortable meeting someone new, you can simply use your affirmation: I am willing to witness my fear. The practice of witnessing your fear is important because it guides you to understand your triggers.
What do you think? Do you experience fear and anxiety? How do you manage it?